May 2012
1 tag
mom: i'm buying you justin bieber tickets and entering a contest to win a meet and greet with him
me: *screams and starts to cry
mom:
me:
mom:
me:
mom: k bye
enter-the-floyd:
m4nduh:
riptide-:
optimesstic:
seh jumoed like a friggincattwhaatsgcyudgveufv
OMG I PISS MY PANTS EVERYTIME ALKSJDFLKJASDFLKJASF
omfg this was so funny. i cant even
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
3 tags
theepichumor:
isn’t it strange how attractive people are really just a nice-looking arrangement of atoms
like
damn you have a great deoxyribonucleic acid arrangement
I think it's rude to text while on the phone.
No one wants to hear a fucking clicking sound. Even if you have a touch screen. Also, no one likes repeating themselves. Especially me. If you’re gonna talk to me, talk to me. If we are on the phone and i’m talking to you. You say “sorry what? I was texting” Or just keep saying “yeah”. That’s annoying. I hate people who text while on the phone. Can I just get a decent conversation with no...
period: WAKE UP ASSHOLE, YOU GOT CRAMPS.
period: How bout an entire chocolate cake for breakfast?
period: How's that back pain? Feeling better? Let's fix that.
period: Corneas glance by a VS magazine on the table. Instantly horny.
period: Find a cookie as big as a house and eat it.
period: See a male specimen of any kind. Instantly horny.
period: Where's your Tic Tac box filled with ibuprofen?
period: Got things to do? Don't care. Sleep.
period: See a female specimen of any kind. Instantly horny.
period: For dinner you're eating an entire bag of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.
period: Breeze blows by. Instantly horny.
period: You didn't like those brand new underwear right?
period: Yell at a puppy.
period: Close eyes and wait for repeat tomorrow.